The Fifty Shades of Grey saga has undoubtedly sparked a great deal of interest and discussion surrounding sexual practices related to domination.
Many people are afraid of these sexual practices without ever having tried them! You are the one who knows your limits; you simply need to respect them. There is no need to go to extremes.
“In our culture, society conveys that sexuality should not be marked by aggression, but rather by gentle caresses, tenderness, and sensuality. Yet for many people, when a certain degree of consensual aggression enters a sexual relationship, arousal rises a notch. It is the surprise, the unexpected, a kind of loss of control that makes aggression pleasurable. It is like giving the middle finger to what sexuality has always taught us.”
- Véronique Larivière, sexologist
Sadomasochistic relationships are often considered abnormal, perverse, immoral... Yet they provide a way to break out of routine, heighten desire, and develop a beautiful sense of connection in a couple or between partners. We must not forget the loving dimension; rather, we should see this as a “game,” a sexual relationship that unfolds like a scenario, with a dominant partner and a submissive partner.
So... are you dominant or submissive?
There are no right or wrong answers; you can be one, the other, or... both!
Dominant:
You are the initiator; you are the one who takes the lead during your sexual encounters. You like trying new things, imposing your rules, giving orders... in short, you enjoy testing your partner’s abilities and limits.
Submissive:
You adopt a “passive” attitude during your sexual encounters. You show yourself to be obedient to your partner’s desires. You like having as few responsibilities as possible so that you can let go more easily. In short, you accept not being in complete control in order to experience a complete and pleasurable feeling of surrender.
Each person’s role is not fixed. As with all sexual games, you need to let go and experiment before you know what you like. Switching roles can be very exciting, depending on your mood at the time!
BDSM accessories are often associated with this practice. They can help you embrace your role, bring the scenario to life, and stimulate people who are not familiar with their bodies.
Warning! Respect and trust are essential in this type of practice. Respect your limits and your partner’s limits. Be aware that domination can involve certain physical and psychological risks. Regardless of your role, you always retain full control over what is and is not right for you.
